And then...

And then sometimes you can be sideswiped by something so much greater than yourself. Every moment is new and you can never say with certainty what's coming next...but you'll do best to be prepared to live fully every moment. Gods Grace be with us. 

L

Sometimes...

Sometimes you just can't count fast enough. Sometimes hours take days...and then sometimes minutes don't even exist, just seconds. Sometimes times are incomprehensible.

L

And we walk...and then we go to Banff and hype the kid up on whipped cream in a cup. Oh Sunday. 

Oh Sunday.

Oh, how we love Sundays. Today we drove out to Johnstons Canyon after a wonderful morning at The Lantern. Picked up Genoa Salami and Havarti at the Coop Deli with some buns. Turned off the #1 some hour and a bit later to stumble accross a 'herd' of mountain goats. Is that what they are?  They were mingling around the car and we took many pictures. How could you not? It was amazing. More pictures to follow.

Corn Bread

So I've obtained a need to proclaim to you more frequently now. Perhaps it's because it's one of the few things I can do while doing one of the few things I do...um...aka...what can I do while Greta sleeps and Theodore is having a bath? Fold laundry, read a book (which I haven't done in 3 months), or blog...I'm sure we can all think of a few more things I can do...but for now, I will blog. 

I know some people absolutely love corn bread. I've never understood it. I thought it was because maybe I'd never tried it fresh before. I have a container of cornmeal. I have a cast iron pan. I made some corn bread. I still don't get it. Sure it's nice hot with a dallop of butter....but nothing amazing. Theodore liked it...but not alone. I used a few pieces to turn the chile/soup deal I made for dinner into a thicker sludge he could spoon. Good stuff. I will only make it again if it seems the PERFECT companion to something else...or if David proclaims his love for it...but it won't be fresh. He won't. 

Dryer's almost done tumbling. I talked about corn bread. Time to fold laundry...and I guess I have a few books I've been meaning to read...likely won't for a while though.

Splish splash

L

Festivities not shared...

So I finally convinced myself to bundle up the kids and myself and brave a walk this morning. Poor Theodore hadn't been out in a few days (well, none of us had...but I think he cares more). Went to pick up a pound of coffee down the street. Luke's had Kicking Horse on sale for $9 something. Then I decided to keep up the fresh air and walk down the Avenue to see about window shopping and perhaps sit for a coffee with the kids. We barreled down towards the yarn shop...but our group wasn't too quiet at that moment so we barreled on. Got to Starbucks...the one thats open late...and I discovered MUCH smaller than the one only a couple blocks away. It was swarming. No smiles. Decorations everywhere. Middle aged business men in shiny pointed shoes glaring at me as if to dare me to sit near them with my two vocal kids. I ordered a Ginger Snap Latte and a rice krispie square for Theodore. Birthday money dwindling. Shiny man dove into the last table. Latte ready...and still no krispie square..."oh right"...Theodore gets his square...I jam the stroller into the door twice before getting me and my squawkers out. Managed to hang onto all purchased goods. Not a smile or friendly face in the bunch. I tried. I did. Why don't you all go home and try popcorn and a candle lit fort! Decided to bench it outside and discover my latte might qualify as warm...shiny man staring from the window...wind gusts bothering Theodore. Decided to walk home. Dead rabbit in a tipped over box on the corner of the Junior High. Boys eating hot dog buns. Theodore yelling "moh peese me-me".  Mitt handled krispie snack is over. Home. Cabbage rolls. Baby hugs and snuggles. Both in bed and I have a bath. Ice pellets now on the windows. Can't wait to put the balcony lights on tonight. 

Stay warm everyone...it sure is cold sometimes.

L

Miniature Festivities

Okay, so I guess it's my turn because I am feeling the vibe. I'm not sure why I feel so festive before the calendar page has turned...perhaps because the kids have recieved early gifts with family visitors. It's got me jolly jovial craving christmas cozy. Theodore and I put up a string of lights on the balcony and 19 christmas balls on the bookshelves. Stockings are hung (still with Ikea tags on them...thanks Mama), carols are on, smelly candles out, and a big bowl of christmas oranges. I would post the pictures I took, if only I were more available to figure out how. Maybe David can give me a hand later...see what he thinks of the tiny tree I brought out...the one he almost didn't let me bring out here. 

L

Times

Casually I sit awake in bed, eating leftovers from dinner, Chicken with chick peas, corn and some potato wedges. Of course ketchup , and not heated up. 

Today it was said to me " You will only be as big as you want to be , and you will only be as small as you allow yourself to be." What does that mean.

Actually... that means so much that its really not something people should say off the cuff. 

To me I hear it as you will only be as good as you want to be and as bad as you allow your self to be. But I think thats shit!

So many wonderful and indescribably excellent things exist because they stay small.  Restaurants, music stores, art galleries, churches. Funny all the things I love the most it seems are small. Maybe I am called to shall we change the word from small to bad to intimate... thoughtful, accessible, inclusive. 

(bites later)

This life is "calling" us to all and every opportunity it seems. But some wonderfully wise and loving people once said to Louise and I ...

"... many wonderful opportunities and great things will come across your path, the hard part is knowing which of them or what combination is going to bring you closer towards your life's mission statement?"

I personally love thinking of my life as having its own purpose and I in it play a part, but it as a whole is made up of so much more then me. Its made up of all the people in my life wether for periods or always. It is made up of memories, and how I hold on to them and with what tension. Back to people, it is made up by the ways the people around me live. We are not our own to hold and foster, but we are ours for the sharing and the learning from others. As Jesus says our selflessness and death to self is the gain of love and life. Our interests and passions are for us to exercise without really truly knowing the goodness and wonder it gives to other's. 

Things Im thinking about

"the act of holding your tongue, can lift the marginalized." 

"It is better to obey then to sacrifice"

Christ says" Let me be servent so you can be King." Philipians 

I want to do good, even in the midst of being human.

happiness

this is our day

and we are each others.

The misery of distant love, but the inspiring wait.

I don't want to spend to much time focusing on how little attention I have had to do exactly this. So Goodmorning

With a smile in my heart I wish this for all my dearest friends, and family. Your lives have and continue to smile on me knowing that you have days when you laugh and hug someone. This last weekend was a gift. We shopped, laughed, walked , oohhhed and awwed and the mystery of baby gorillas. Time was spent with no strings attached, my children were loved in a great and beautiful way.

Our time out here so far has been with many challenges and also life building memories. To look back, neither one of us could have seen the magnitude of our decisions. But this is life, and we together only have one. Strange perhaps but we are both responsible to each other for our future commitments and postures through circumstances.  I miss home. and I miss dearly the thought of games night with my best friends. 

What is life about?

My post today is heavy and emotional due to the weekend spent with family and the party that I missed. I love you all,  beyond your understanding. Pray for peace and joy for our family as we continue to wrestle with this still very new place. 

ps. the book "a year of mornings" shows to me what MY life is about, and with each page flipped my heart heavies. 

                                                              all our love